A is for Assface
Assface [noun]: a person whose face looks like a butt.
B is for Beaverhausen
Beaverhausen [noun]: where the beaver lives; handy to use as part of an alias.
C is for Chanel
Chanel [noun]: rich people clothes.
D is for Designated Drinker
Designated Drinker [noun]: a friend who is never sober.
E is for Emotions
Emotions [noun]: feelings only weak people experience.
F is for Frosted Glass
Frosted Glass [noun]: the ideal vessel for a cocktail.
G is for Gin
Gin [noun]: broth for drunks.
H is for High Road
High Road [noun]: the route you take when you’re high.
I is for Immortal
Immortal [adjective]: the ability to live forever, usually through a pact with the devil.
J is for Juice Boxes
Juice Boxes [noun]: cheap wine for adults.
K is for Karen Walker
Karen Walker [noun]: the oldest, drunkest, most fabulous woman on Earth.
L is for Look
Look [noun]: the exhausting act of directing one’s gaze toward something.
M is for Mood Elevators
Mood Elevators [noun]: happy pills.
N is for Nobody
Nobody [noun]: any person who is not Karen Walker.
O is for Outside
Outside [noun]: a location separate from your mansion.
P is for Pretend
Pretend [verb]: the act of feigning interest in Grace Adler’s life.
Q is for Quack
Quack [noun]: harsh sound used to shut people up.
R is for Regret
Regret [verb]: a feeling often associated with alcohol.
S is for Slap
Slap [verb]: to hit someone with an open hand in order to show them who’s boss.
T is for Tact
Tact [noun]: sensitivity in dealing with humorless people.
U is for Under the Sink
Under the Sink [noun]: a place to store and find prescription drugs.
V is for Vodka
Vodka [noun]: alcohol, for when there is no gin.
W is for What’s This?
What’s This [phrase]: a question to which Grace rarely has an answer.
X is for Xanax
Xanax [noun]: anxiety medication used by Karen as a security blanket.
Y is for You Know
You Know [phrase]: a way to clue your friends in on your hobbies.
Z is for Zoo
Zoo [noun]: a place to poke bears.